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November 25, 2003

Jesus is back, and he hates cops
Deseret News | Submitted by: 'stache
"At about 8 a.m. a Pleasant Grove man told his mother he was Jesus Christ and ordered her to leave her home on High Country Drive in Orem. The man's mother called police for help. When officer Shane Fredrickson arrived at the home, the man became violent, said Orem Police Lt. Doug Edwards. Fredrickson tried to stun the man with a Tazer gun - but it had little effect. [Did he really expect that thing to work on Jesus?] Then, Edwards said, the man attacked the officer, biting him on the finger through his glove. The right index finger, according to Edwards, was badly damaged. The fingernail was ripped off and the tip of the bone broken."

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Glenn Campbell a mean drunk
AZ Central | Submitted by: FastEddy
"Glen Campbell was arrested at his Phoenix home Monday on suspicion of drunken driving and aggravated assault... Phoenix police Sgt. Bill Niles said he was forced to restrain the entertainer's arms and legs after Campbell raised his knee and struck Niles on his right thigh during questioning at a police substation Monday evening. Campbell, 67, also attempted to kick another officer after striking Niles, but the officer dodged the blow and was unharmed, Niles said... 'He was having mood swings and ended up taking his knee and raising it to me and hit me above the knee area,' Niles said. 'There was a lot of "Do you know who I am?" A lot of profanities. He didn't think he should be treated like a common criminal because of who he was. He went from calm and cooperative to becoming very loud.' Phoenix police Sgt. Randy Force said Campbell also kicked a patrol car and the door of his holding cell at the police substation. When Campbell was inside the intake facility at Madison Street Jail in Phoenix, he could be heard singing his hit song "Rhinestone Cowboy." ... Campbell acknowledged in an interview with The Arizona Republic last month to struggling with bouts of alcoholism and abusing cocaine, but said he stopped using the drug 20 years ago when he met his wife, Kim." With exceptional mugshot.

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South African satanists in full effect
News 24 South Africa | Submitted by: Vulgrin von Kirk
"The vision of a pastor has led to the gruesome find of a young girl's body in a suspected Satanist coven in an old mine ventilation shaft. Police said the coven, in which several indications of Satanist activities were found, was discovered on Thursday last week. This comes after pastor Pieter de Beer of the Hope church had a vision in which he saw a snake slithering into a big hole... According to the Satanist calendar, the period between July 20 and 27 is a time of sacrificial preparation. July 27 is the culmination of this sexual ritual and female sacrifice."

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Woman murdered by own hired killer
Sydney Morning Herald | Submitted by: sTabby
"A woman who hired a hit man to kill her husband's lover got more than she bargained for when the assassin murdered her instead. The Beijing woman agreed to pay Li Changjiang $16,773 to kill or disfigure her husband's mistress but when he failed to do so she demanded the money back. Li, with associates Zhang Hongyu and Sun Yanhai, showed they had no qualms about carrying out the deadly deed by killing her instead."

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Canadian dumped in Afghanistan
Globe and Mail | Submitted by: bush_fucker
"The lawyer of a Abdul Rahman Khadr, a terrorist suspect apparently released secretly from prison in Cuba and flown to central Asia, has called on the federal government to provide written assurance that his client will be given the documents he needs to return home to Canada... lawyer Rocco Galati said that Canadian officials have so far denied his client a passport and are either 'negligent or spinning lies' when they deny knowing where he is... Mr. Galati - who represents several men accused of al-Qaeda terror links - said Mr. Khadr's case smacks of a modern day witchhunt. 'Canada is acting illegally, unconstitutionally and, arguably, in a criminal fashion,' he accused. 'Canada, I hate to say it, does not recognize brown-skinned Muslims.'"

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Toddler watches dad stab mom to death
pub.tv2.no | Submitted by: optional
"A 2-year-old saw his mother being stabbed to death. His father was arrested for the murder yesterday. When the police arrived at the apartment, the 39-year-old man opened the door covered in blood, carrying his 2-year-old son. Inside the apartment, the boy's mother was found mortally wounded."

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Christmas elf strangles teenager
Aftenposten | Submitted by: kintaro
"An outing to a shopping center ended with a shock for 13-year-old Joakim Osland. A fjoesnisse, a kind of elf that traditionally occupies barns and wears a red cap associated with Christmas and Santa Claus, became frighteningly furious when Joakim tried to pet his hen, newspaper Firda reports... 'He grabbed me, first with one hand, then the other, so that he was strangling me. He said I should respect animals. The elf scared me a bit.' Joakim and his friends, Soelvi Hestvik, 15, and Rune Kristiansen, 15, thought the elf overreacted. After the throttling Joakim was red-faced, and had marks on his throat, they said."

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Zambia mulls castrating pedophiles
Independent Online | Submitted by: Reid Fleming
"Legislators have recommended castrating men who rape children in Zambia where incidences of the crime rose by 68 percent in the first half of this year. Members of parliament had given initial approval to the measure, allowing it to go for cabinet consideration, a parliamentary official said on Tuesday."

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Guantanamo chaplain charged with adultery, porn
Miami Herald | Submitted by: Reid Fleming
"A Muslim chaplain accused of taking classified material from the U.S. prison for terrorist suspects in Cuba was charged Tuesday by the military with adultery and storing pornography on a government computer. The military released Army Capt. James Yee from custody and will allow him to return to duty at a base in Georgia... Authorities arrested Yee, 35, in September and charged him with disobeying an order for allegedly taking classified material from Guantanamo and improperly transporting it... The new charges include making a false statement, storing pornography on a government computer and having sexual relations outside marriage, which violates military law. The adultery allegedly occurred with an unspecified woman at Guantanamo and in Orlando, Fla., between July and September 2003, and the pornography was on his government-issued computer at the base in eastern Cuba."

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Woman accidentally sticks baby with knife
Pittsburgh Post-Gazette | Submitted by: drewicide
"Samantha Carla Hoffman, 23, of Clintonville, was jailed Sunday on assault and reckless endangerment charges... Hoffman's boyfriend pulled down her sweat pants while Hoffman was in the kitchen preparing food and 'as (he) was walking away she threw a butter knife at him,' according to a criminal complaint. The knife became lodged in the baby, who was in a baby walker in the kitchen."

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Mental patient goes on bulldozer rampage
News Corporation | Submitted by: Reid Fleming
"A mentally-disturbed man wreaked havoc in a bulldozer early yesterday, chasing police cars and ploughing through a hospital building on his rampage. The 21-year-old, who escaped from a mental hospital in Bankstown, smashed his way through the entrance of Campbelltown Hospital psychiatric wing, Waratah House, before leaving a trail of destruction through nearby streets. Six police cars cornered the man about 1am in Ambarvale Park, close to the hospital where he had smashed windows, doors, signs and a fence... The man took the heavy earth mover from RTA roadworks near the hospital. Police said the keys may have been left in the vehicle."

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Former child actor hangs self
CNN | Submitted by: optional
"The death of 27-year-old actor Jonathan Brandis, who starred in two seasons of Steven Spielberg's SeaQuest DSV, was a suicide, the county coroner's office said Monday. Brandis, who died November 12, hanged himself, the coroner said."

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Roofer allegedly throws hammer party
Boston Globe | Submitted by: dianalily
"A 49-year-old roofer pleaded not guilty yesterday to charges that he beat his housemate in the head with a hammer Sunday in an attack that has left her hospitalized... Michael Stuart accused his housemate, Kathleen Powers, 49, of stealing from him, prosecutors said in Natick District Court... Around 2 p.m. he returned to Powers's room with a hammer and hit her at least 12 times in the face, head, legs, and feet."

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Airline delivers feline popsicle, shrugs
WCAU-TV 10 Philadelphia | Submitted by: optional
"[Sara Stano] said she chose Delta Airlines for their trip from Portland, Ore., to Greensboro, N.C. because it was the only airline that promised to allow all three cats as carry-on luggage. But Stano said when her family went to check-in, they were only allowed two cats as carry-on and were forced to check the other into the cargo area. Once they arrived in Greensboro, the cat was dead... Stano's mother told reporters her daughter's account of what happened next. 'She said the man in Greensboro came up to her, handed her the kennel and just said, "Here's your cat, we don't know what happened" and he turned around and walked off."'"

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Hash-smoking doctor botches urinalysis trick
estripes.com | Submitted by: Gondwanaland Liberation Army
"A Vilseck-based doctor who used drugs while in Amsterdam, then bloodily botched an attempt to give a fake urine sample to Army authorities, will go to jail for a year... Knowing he could be subject to a random drug test at any time, Munnell said he had stored a sample of 'clean' urine in his office at the Vilseck Medical Clinic before he went to Amsterdam. [That's called planning ahead.] When the surprise drug test came Jan. 2, he took the sample and tried to inject it into his bladder. Instead, he badly injured himself. 'It didnít work as I intended,' Munnell told the court. 'It caused uncontrollable penile bleeding.' ... He got treatment at a German hospital."

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India's answer to David Blaine
BBC | Submitted by: Fre
"Doctors and experts are baffled by an Indian hermit who claims not to have eaten or drunk anything for several decades - but is still in perfect health. Prahlad Jani, a holy man, or fakir, who is over 70 years old, has just spent 10 days under constant observation in Sterling Hospital, in the western Indian city of Ahmedabad. During that time, he did not consume anything and 'neither did he pass urine or stool,' according to the hospital's deputy superintendent, Dr Dinesh Desai... A statement from Ahmedabad's Association of Physicians says that despite no water entering his body, urine nonetheless appeared to form in his bladder - only to be re-absorbed by the bladder walls."

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Cult expert Margaret Singer dead
Sacramento Bee | Submitted by: Reid Fleming
"Psychologist Margaret Singer, an expert on brainwashing and cults, has died. She was 82. Singer, who studied the Peoples Temple, Branch Davidian and Symbionese Liberation Army among other groups, died Sunday after a long illness at Alta Bates Medical Center in Berkeley... Singer testified in the 1976 bank robbery trial of newspaper heiress Patricia Hearst, who was kidnapped by the Symbionese Liberation Army. She interviewed more than 3,000 cult members, assisted in more than 200 court cases and was a leading authority on schizophrenia and family therapy... In a 2002 interview with the San Francisco Chronicle, she told how, at 80, she had frightened off someone who'd been leaving menacing notes in her mailbox. 'I've got a 12-gauge shotgun up here with a spray pattern that'll put a three-foot hole in you, sonny, and you'd better get off my porch, or you'll be sorry!' she shouted out the window."

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