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October 16, 2003

Pentagon general enthusiastic about holy crusade
Sydney Morning Herald | Submitted by: This Nation has gone Fucking Insane
"The Pentagon has given the job of hunting down and eliminating Osama bin Laden, Saddam Hussein and other high-profile targets to a general who believes he is on a mission from God... In June, General Boykin told a religious group in Oregon that radical Islamists hated the US 'because we're a Christian nation, because our foundation and our roots are Judeo-Christian... and the enemy is a guy named Satan.' Of his role in the battle against a Muslim warlord in Somalia, he told another audience: 'I knew my God was bigger than his. I knew that my God was a real God and his was an idol.' Last year, he said: 'We in the army of God, in the house of God, kingdom of God, have been raised for such a time as this.' He has also said of President George Bush: 'He's in the White House because God put him there.'"

Read article... and This... and This...

Suspect forced to drink urine, taste feces
Hindustan Times | Submitted by: Reid Fleming
"Police in Jabalpur in Madhya Pradesh allegedly forced an accused wanted in some cases to drink urine and put human and pig's excreta in his mouth to humiliate him... The police wanted [Rajesh Tiwari] in connection with an attempt to murder and other cases for last few months. The police got hold of him on October 13 and brought him to his native village Ittoli where he beaten up before being forced to drink urine, family members of Rajesh and some villagers claimed."

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Staten Island ferry pilot allegedly attempts suicide
Boston Globe | Submitted by: Rev. Soror Lucy Cannon
"Police were investigating the possibility that the boat's pilot, responsible for docking the vessel, might have been asleep at the controls... The pilot, identified as Richard Smith, bolted so quickly, the source said, that he left behind his gear and his keys. He then broke into his house and twice attempted suicide, slitting his wrists and shooting himself with a pellet gun, the source said. A co-worker told authorities that Smith had been asleep, slumped over the controls."

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Worker buried under 32 tons of sewage
Toronto Star | Submitted by: ckm
"A driver less than two weeks on the job hauling Toronto's sewage to Michigan dumpsites was killed when his 70,000-pound (32-tonne) load spilled on him as he was emptying the massive truck into a landfill trench, police say. Jovan Sarovic, 38, of Kitchener, was knocked into the trench early yesterday by the tailgate of the truck in which he had transported biosolids produced by Toronto's Ashbridges Bay sewage treatment plant. The contents of the truck then poured out on him... Preliminary reports were that the tailgate of the truck flew open with such force that it knocked him into the trench and the load then came down on him."

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US troops still unhappy in Iraq
Independent Online | Submitted by: Sad Sam
"A survey of American troops in Iraq by the military newspaper Stars And Stripes has found that nearly three-quarters of those questioned said unit morale was low or average, and that nearly half did not plan to re-enlist... More than one-third said that their mission was 'not clearly' or 'not at all' defined."

Read article... and This article...

Malaysian Prime Minister: Jews rule the world
CNN | Submitted by: el capitan skyhawk
"Malaysia's prime minister has urged Muslims to unite against Jews who, he says, rule the world by 'proxy' - comments criticized by Jewish leaders as an invitation to violence... In his speech at Putrajaya, Malaysia's new administrative capital, the outgoing leader named Israel as 'the enemy allied with most powerful nations.' ... Mahathir said Jews ruled the world and got others to fight and die for them, but added that they would not be able to defeat the world's 1.3 billion Muslims. 'We are actually very strong, 1.3 billion people cannot be simply wiped out. The Europeans killed 6 million Jews out of 12 million. But today the Jews rule the world by proxy. They get others to fight and die for them,' he said... 'They invented socialism, communism, human rights and democracy, so that persecuting them would appear to be wrong, so that they can enjoy equal rights with others. With these they have gained control of the most powerful countries and they, this tiny community, have become a world power. We cannot fight them through brawn alone, we must use our brains also.'"

Read article... and This article...

Another alleged 9-11 hijacker found alive and well
BBC | Submitted by: NeuroManson
"Another of the men named by the FBI as a hijacker in the suicide attacks on Washington and New York has turned up alive and well... Saudi Arabian pilot Waleed Al Shehri was one of five men that the FBI said had deliberately crashed American Airlines flight 11 into the World Trade Centre on 11 September. His photograph was released, and has since appeared in newspapers and on television around the world. Now he is protesting his innocence from Casablanca, Morocco... FBI Director Robert Mueller acknowledged on Thursday that the identity of several of the suicide hijackers is in doubt."

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Why we need an independent counsel
CBS News | Submitted by: Reid Fleming
"Top Justice Department and FBI officials are worried that Attorney General John Ashcroft is mishandling the probe into whether officials broke federal law when they disclosed the name of a CIA operative, a newspaper reports... Democrats have called for Ashcroft to appoint a special counsel, similar to the eight independent probes launched during the Clinton administration. Democrats have cited Ashcroft's ties not only to Mr. Bush, who appointed the attorney general, but also to Karl Rove, the president's top strategist and a potential key figure in the investigation... Rove's political consulting firm received $300,000 from Ashcroft's 1994 Senate campaign, and Rove donated $1,000 to Ashcroft in 1999 - one of only five candidates Rove supported financially."

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Logan Airport security still fucking up
Reuters | Submitted by: Gambrinus
"Undercover agents posing as passengers last week smuggled weapons past security checkpoints at Logan International Airport, where two of the planes used in the Sept. 11 attacks took off from, The Boston Globe reported on Thursday... the agents carried knives, a bomb and a gun past several checkpoints at different terminals without being stopped by Transportation Security Administration officers... 'We don't deny the tests occur; we welcome them and we do them ourselves. We see great value in them and passengers should be more concerned if we weren't conducting them,' she said." [Well, we'd be a lot less concerned if the security screeners could pass the damn tests.]

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Indian bachelors kidnapped, tortured, married off
Sydney Morning Herald | Submitted by: TinMan666
"It is a big mistake to venture out at night if you are young, male and unmarried in the Indian state of Bihar. Subhash Kumar, a bank clerk in Patna, let his guard down and paid the price by being kidnapped. Four days after being carried off by a gang of thugs, manacled to a bed, starved and severely beaten, Kumar found himself married to a girl he had never seen before. His tears and offers to pay ransom led to beatings, at least until the nuptials were complete. During the marriage ceremony a rope was tied around Kumar's waist in case he disgraced the bride's family by trying to flee. But by then, the resistance had been beaten out of him. In those dark hours, all he wanted was for the nightmare to end, even if it meant being married to a complete stranger. The next day a sullen Kumar took his wife home, vowing vengeance against his in-laws. But, like thousands of similarly married Bihari grooms, he feared the kidnappers' vengeance. Unwilling to face more beatings, he resigned himself to marriage."

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GM renames its upcoming wankmobile
Canoe | Submitted by: Reid Fleming
"A General Motors executive yesterday admitted that the future Buick model - which is set to debut late next year - will be re-named in Canada after GM learned LaCrosse is a Quebec slang term for masturbation... GM vice-chairman Bob Lutz, who was in Toronto yesterday to address a gathering of GM dealers, said he wasn't aware of LaCrosse's racy roots although he speaks French and spent three years living in Paris. 'I thought I knew every expression existing in the French language for self-gratification, including the crudest ones known to man,' said the outspoken Lutz."

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Freak arrested for allegedly killing neighbor's dogs
WKMG-TV 6 Orlando | Submitted by: Terrin
"A man was arrested on animal abuse charges after being accused of attacking two neighborhood dogs with a hatchet and a pickax. One died on the scene, the other was so severely injured that it had to be euthanized, authorities said. Robert Jay Renz, 27, was arrested Wednesday and charged with two felony counts of animal cruelty, according to Lee County sheriff's reports... Deputies went to Renz's home on Friday and Monday, both in reference to reports he was trying to kill himself. When they arrived Monday, they found blood on Renz's hands and arms and found a pickax and hatchet, which had hair on it matching the color of the dead dog, according to sheriff's reports."

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Judge locked up for masturbating at work
Independent Online | Submitted by: Reid Fleming
"A French magistrate caught masturbating during a court session was locked up on Thursday and put under investigation, justice officials in the south-western city of Bordeaux said... According to La Charente Libre, a local newspaper who had a reporter in court at the time of the alleged offence, the magistrate had discreetly lifted up his ceremonial robe while a lawyer was presenting final arguments, undid his pants and 'engaged in gestures that left nothing to the imagination.'"

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Armless Iraqi boy now bitter Iraqi cyborg
Independent Online | Submitted by: Sad Sam
"Ali Abbas, the 13-year-old Iraqi boy whose armless torso, horrific burns and haunted eyes came to symbolise all the brutality of the Iraq invasion, has been successfully fitted with artificial limbs... Ali sustained burns to a fifth of his body and was not expected to survive. Then, after four months in a Kuwaiti hospital, he was flown to England for specialist medical treatment. Understandably, his joy over his new arms is tempered by his anger over the bombing... 'I hoped the pilot who hit our house would be burned as I am burned and my family were burned.'"

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Pakistan plagued by people pissing in public places
PakTribune | Submitted by: Reid Fleming
"In majority of countries, humans usually urinate at a toilet. Public toilets are often separate for men and women. Those for men often have also urinals. These may have partitions between them to avoid men being able to see the penises of other men. In contrast, the subcontinent has a peculiar culture which accepts public urniation. Men are seen urinating openly in public places without feeling any embarrasment... Maybe for a change we should allow public kissing of opposite sex in our culture, which is a much more scenic view than seeing somene urinating in front of you." [To each his own.]

Read article...

Thanks for nothing, God
BBC | Submitted by: Frr
"The world's largest study into the effects of prayer on patients undergoing heart surgery has found it appears to make no difference. The MANTRA study, run from Duke University Medical Center in North Carolina, involved 750 patients. Before their operations, they were randomly split into two groups, and half were prayed for by Christians, Jews, Buddhists and Muslims. However, checks revealed they had fared no better than those not prayed for."

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Driver's license photos inspired by Satan
canada.com | Submitted by: Greencolander
"A farmer and fundamentalist Christian who's convinced that digital driver's licence photos are the work of the devil is taking the Ontario government to court to avoid having his picture taken... Bothwell believes that biometrics - the use of physical identifiers such as fingerprints, retina scans and face recognition - is specifically cited in the book of Revelation as the work of agents of the devil. He believes that anyone who allows their image to be archived by an outside agency bears 'the mark of the beast' and will 'drink the wine of the wrath of God' as a result."

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Russia to re-bury tsar's mother
BBC | Submitted by: gremlin
"The Danish-born mother of Russia's last tsar Nicholas II is to make a final journey back to her adopted country, 80 years after her death. The Danish Foreign Ministry says the remains of the Empress-Dowager Maria Fedorovna are to be moved next year from Denmark to a cathedral in St Petersburg... Nicholas II and his wife and children were killed by a firing squad in the Siberian city of Yekaterinburg in 1918, about eight months after the Bolshevik revolution. Their remains were exhumed in 1991 and buried in the St Petersburg cathedral in 1998 after years of argument about their authenticity and several genetic tests."

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North Korea still talking big
Reuters | Submitted by: Gambrinus
"North Korea said Thursday it would display a 'nuclear deterrent' at an appropriate time to end debate over its nuclear status if the United States delayed a solution to an impasse over Pyongyang's atomic ambitions... 'When an appropriate time comes, the DPRK will take a measure to open its nuclear deterrent to the public as a physical force and then there will be no need to have any more argument,' the ministry spokesman said, noting some people doubted the North had nuclear capability."

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Hunters blamed for bears' candy addiction
ESPN | Submitted by: Nick Jones
"Hunters who bait bears with large blocks of candy are creating addicts with health problems ranging from tooth decay to lethargy, wildlife officials say... bears become addicted to the blocks, returning to the area even after the sugar is gone. Biologists found that addicted bears suffer from tooth decay, hair loss, weight loss and lethargy, said David Cobb, chief of the Wildlife Management Division of the Wildlife Resources Commission... a $15 block can be up to four feet square and five feet deep and made of bubble gum, chocolate, licorice and hard candy. Some weigh more than 2,000 pounds. Martin said many recent blocks have come from Hershey Foods in Pennsylvania... Cobb once found a bear lying down in the middle of the road, moaning and unwilling to move out of the vehicle's way. He compared the image to that of humans addicted to cocaine."

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New frog species discovered in India
Sydney Morning Herald | Submitted by: Bassplayer69
"The purple, small-headed creature with tiny eyes, protruding snout and a bloated appearance belongs to a new family of frogs that scientists thought had either never existed or had disappeared without trace millions of years ago. The frog has been named nasikabatrachidae, which is Sanskrit for frog with a nose... Its closest living relatives are a family frogs called sooglossidae that are found only in the Seychelles in the Indian Ocean, about 3000 kilometres from India. 'You could say it is a living fossil,' said Dr Bossuyt, referring to the new species." With photo.

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