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June 14, 2003

Frozen food worker chopped into meat chunks
statesman.com | Submitted by: Sluggo the Horrible
"A food plant worker died Friday after getting caught in a meat-processing machine at a company that had been cited for safety violations. ... The machine is not a meat grinder; it moves meat downward to be processed further, police said. The large, bowl-shaped machine contains paddle-like arms that move in a circular motion, police said. 'Once he was caught in it, he would have been entangled in those,' said Sgt. Robert Horton of the Round Rock Police Department. 'It was a gruesome scene.'"

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Viagra killing animal penis sales
CNN | Submitted by: Tim howard
"Li Tong has made quite a name for himself in the restaurant business. ... The Hong Kong entrepreneur has scoured the world for special ingredients he claims can boost sexual performance. These ingredients all have one thing in common -- they are all animal penises. Among them seal, deer, ostrich and snake penises that have been hunted for thousands of years for use in traditional Chinese medicine, particularly for erectile dysfunction."

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Cat torturer doesn't fool anybody
canada.com | Submitted by: Tim Howard
"Power's lawyer portrayed him as a vegan with a mature social conscience who conceived the cat-killing as an 'artistic protest' against meat-eating... Dr. Klassen detailed how Power and two friends had once purchased a pig carcass and videotaped him in a variety of poses with it; how he once killed a chicken and presented the video at school; how one of his sketchbooks was filled with detailed drawings of bowels and internal organs; how he purposely sought work at an abattoir; how his self-portrayal as a vegetarian was fraudulent; that he has 'an abiding interest in the skeletons of animals and in handling dead animals'; and that, in Power's own words, though he had tried to 'pass off' or 'spin' the cat's torture as purely artistic, he had never been sure if he would have completed it as an 'art' project." With detailed description of cat torture video.

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Drunk jarhead kills bar customer over Iraq War comments
South Florida Sun-Sentinel | Submitted by: Tim Howard
"'My name is Ron Mellor. I live at 931 North J Street. I just shot a man.' When a dispatcher asked why, he responded, 'Because he was very anti- ... very ... very anti-American and he was very against the war.' Mellor surrendered to police minutes later. He said Komyakevich got him upset after the bar manager made comments that he thought the U.S. was wrong for going to war against Iraq and took pleasure in U.S. soldiers getting captured."

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Murderer snagged through improper body disposal
AZ Central | Submitted by: FastEddy
"Avondale police said a man arrested on first-degree murder charges after body parts were found in his trash may have tried to burn the body before dumping the remains. Police first found the woman's upper torso and lower legs inside a trash bin that had just been picked up by garbage collectors. After tracing the remains back to the home of Adam Sernas, 31, on Wednesday morning, they found the woman's midsection inside a blue recycling bin there. ... Sernas had asked the garbage truck driver for new plastic bins because his existing ones had melted 'due to him burning something that was dead inside.'"

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NYPD releases unflattering perp sketch
New York Post | Submitted by: Dirty Sammy
"Police yesterday released a sketch of the 'Spider-Man' burglar who's broken into 24 upper Manhattan apartments in the past six weeks by scaling drainpipes and fire escapes and shimmying through open windows. ... The suspect was described as a slim, clean-shaven black man, aged 25 to 35 and measuring 5-foot-7 to 5-foot-10." The police sketch is priceless.

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FBI finds stolen Oscar during drug raid
Orlando Sentinel | Submitted by: Tim Howard
"FBI agents on a drug investigation were shocked to find one of three missing Oscars stolen in 2000, authorities said Friday. The statuette, found Thursday, has been verified by the Academy of Motion Picture Arts and Sciences as one of 55 stolen while they were being transported from their Chicago manufacturer to Los Angeles."

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David Lynch raising money for bullshit factory
Sacramento Bee | Submitted by: Reid Fleming
"Practitioners of Transcendental Meditation want to build a $4 million center where 200 followers of Maharishi Mahesh Yogi can gather twice a day to practice a technique called 'yogic flying.' ... Backers include actors Stephen Collins, Laura Dern, Heather Graham and Laura Harring as well as director David Lynch. ... 'It's not a pretty building where people strum guitars and sing about peace,' said director Lynch, who said he has practiced TM for 30 years. 'It's a peace factory.' ... According to the Transcendental Meditation Web site, yogic flying involves the body lifting up and moving forward in short hops. The individual experiences bliss and, when practiced by a group of people, yogic flying helps to reduce negative energy and promotes positive trends in the larger society."

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Internet divorce just a sham
ABC TV affiliates | Submitted by: optional
"After 38 years of marriage, Paul Kushnick wanted out. So, admittedly without his wife's consent or knowledge, he tapped into 'Global Associates,' a company doing business on the Internet. The promise of a quick Mexican divorce was enticing so he paid $1,500 dollars and a few weeks later got his divorce papers in the mail. ... Judge Anthony Falanga, State Supreme Court Justice: 'There was no basic entitlement to the divorce from what we could see. No notice, no appearance in Mexico, just fill out some forms on the Internet and, "poof, I'm divorced." It doesn't work that way.'" And when Kushnick got remarried, he inadvertently committed bigamy. Whoops.

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