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May 28, 2003

Twins shot dead, crispy dad nearby
iAfrica | Submitted by: Tim Howard
"The mother of a pair of deceased twins, who were found dead on Monday morning, has said her daughters 'are with the Lord, because everyone always said they looked like angels.' The pair of seven-year-old twins were found on the Marble Hall/Codrington Road near Bela-Bela (Warmsbaths). They had been shot in the chest and were found lying side by side. The charred body of a man, thought to be their father, was found in a burnt-out car nearby, a report in the Beeld said."

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Texas mom abandons kids on highway intersection
Ft. Worth Star-Telegram | Submitted by: Tim Howard
"A 23-year-old woman, accused with her boyfriend of abandoning her 22-month-old twin daughters in traffic on Texas 199, told investigators in a phone call Tuesday that she did nothing wrong. ... 'Basically, she said that she did no wrong; she did not endanger the children. They were fine where she left them because traffic had already stopped,' Pringle quoted Radacy as saying. 'She said she would come see me in four or five days, when she got around to it,' Pringle said."

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Rumsfeld admits possibility of no Iraqi WMDs
BBC | Submitted by: Gambrinus
"The US Defence Secretary, Donald Rumsfeld, has acknowledged for the first time that Iraq may have destroyed its weapons of mass destruction before the US launched its offensive to topple Saddam Hussein's regime." As reported elsewhere: "Speaking to the New York-based Council on Foreign Relations thinktank, he said the speed of U.S. advance may have caught Iraq by surprise, but added: 'It is also possible that they decided that they would destroy them prior to a conflict.'" Well, that explains everything. Good job.

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U.S. discovers its own WMDs buried in Maryland
Guardian | Submitted by: Otis Criblecross
"The good news for the Pentagon yesterday was that its investigators had finally unearthed evidence of weapons of mass destruction, including 100 vials of anthrax and other dangerous bacteria. The bad news was that the stash was found, not in Iraq, but fewer than 50 miles from Washington, near Fort Detrick in the Maryland countryside. ... Even more embarrassing for the Pentagon, there was no documentation about the various biological agents disposed of at the US bio-defence centre at Fort Detrick. Iraq's failure to come up with paperwork proving the destruction of its biological arsenal was portrayed by the US as evidence of deception in the run-up to the war."

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Corpse drives into mini-mart
Boston Globe | Submitted by: Gary MiddleMan
"He'd actually been dead for hours, apparently after shooting himself in the torso as his car idled across the street from the gas station. Police said the unidentified man seems to have shot himself sometime overnight. Hours later, after rigor mortis set in, his foot either fell off the brake or hit the accelerator."

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Morocco suicide bombing mastermind dies in custody
networks.org | Submitted by: Tim Howard
"A total of 43 people, including 12 suicide bombers, were killed in the May 16 attacks in Morocco's largest city. The suspect, identified as Abdelhak and also known as Moul al-Sebbat, was arrested Monday in the northern town of Fes and died while being transferred to a hospital in Casablanca, the prosecutor said. An autopsy found that he had 'died a natural death' that was 'the result of heart and liver problems,' according to the prosecutor." Plus maybe some beatings.

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'Ferris Wheel's Off Day' leaves 12 dead
AZ Central | Submitted by: Tim Howard
"Strong winds and pounding rain toppled a Ferris wheel at a temple festival in southern India, killing 12 people and injuring more than 20 others, police said Wednesday. The dead included three boys, said V. Rajendra, the police chief of Karur district in Tamil Nadu state, where the accident took place Tuesday. ... About 30 people were on the Ferris wheel when it collapsed."

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Psycho slips airport security to sleep on plane
Wire Services | Submitted by: Tim Howard
"A man described as a paranoid schizophrenic sneaked through security at Pittsburgh's airport late at night and was found sleeping aboard a parked commuter airplane the next morning, authorities said. Louis Esquivel remained at the Allegheny County Jail on Wednesday in lieu of $25,000 bond, county Police Superintendent Ken Fulton said. Flight attendants told police they found Esquivel, 23, of San Antonio, at 5:30 a.m. Saturday in a seventh-row seat of an American Eagle plane." Somebody's gonna get fired for this.

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Dutch cannabis cafes to go up in smoke?
Wire Services | Submitted by: Tim Howard
"Officials have just put the finishing touches to a measure banning smoking in cannabis-selling cafes. Due to get government approval soon, the law aims to protect employees of all companies from passive smoking. "Any coffee shop that has employees will be affected too," said Trudy Prins, director of Dutch anti-smoking group Stivoro." Next they'll ban smoking in the brothels.

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Whitney Houston hanging with religious cult
Fox News | Submitted by: Reid Fleming
Whitney Houston and Bobby Brown are in Israel, visiting a religious sect known as the Black Hebrews, who are somewhat... er, controversial. "[T]he Black Hebrews are well known in Israel and elsewhere as black supremacists. They also believe in polygamy -- marriage to many women at once -- and are vegetarians. Members who do not follow their practices are punished."

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Reality TV gay dating show
AZ Central | Submitted by: Tim Howard
"The Bravo cable network is going where no television dating show has gone before: matchmaking gay men. 'Boy Meets Boy,' a six-episode series that will premiere in July, also twists reality show conventions by secretly including straight men among the pool of dating prospects. ... Already, the Traditional Values Coalition plans to alert its 43,000 member churches to protest the series, said Andrea Lafferty, the Washington-based group's executive director. 'What's next after Boy Meets Boy? Boy Meets Sheep?'" Say what you will, but those homophobes sure know how to tell a joke.

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Moronic crook hits same 7-Eleven 4 times
Chicago Sun-Times | Submitted by: Tim Howard
"As a robber, the knife-wielding man who held up a 7-Eleven/Citgo mini-mart in Aurora four times since May 8 wasn't the brightest. For one thing, police said Tuesday, he kept hitting the same place, which helped store employees provide a description of him. For another, he didn't wear a mask. Which helped the police when the convenience store on Aurora's West Side was robbed again early Monday. They found Shane C. Spooner hiding in a nearby cluster of trees. It turned out that Spooner, 28, lives less than half a mile from the store."

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Gay doctorate says Jesus was gay
News Corporation | Submitted by: Tim Howard
"Jesus was gay and so were at least three of his 12 disciples, according to a Melbourne academic. Dr. Rollan McCleary, a University of Queensland PhD graduate who now lives in Melbourne, will today be awarded his doctorate for a thesis on gay spirituality. Dr. McCleary said Jesus's astrological chart, clues in the scriptures to which the churches had been blind and accurate biblical translations had all played a part in his conclusions." More like asstrological chart, am I right fellas?

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Canadian PM not a big fan of President Bush
canada.com | Submitted by: Tim Howard
"Jean Chrétien, the Prime Minister, offered strong criticisms yesterday of George W. Bush, the U.S. President, attacking both his economic stewardship and his conservative social policies. ... Mr. Chrétien took issue with the Bush administration running a $500-billion deficit while claiming to run a 'right-wing' government." Come on, he's just following Reaganomics: deregulate everything, slash social welfare spending, pump up the military industrial complex, and ignore the unprecedented budget deficits. Pretty standard stuff.

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