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March 01, 2003

Man was selling cadaver toenails
Wire Services | Submitted by: deb
"A man who supervised the donated-body program at the University of Texas Medical Branch at Galveston allegedly pocketed more than $18,000 from selling nails from the fingers and toes of cadavers... In one transaction, Tyler received $4,005 for 232 fingernails at $15 each and 35 toenails at $15 each, according to Tyler's records."

Read article... and This article...

Pet deer kills man, grandson kills deer
WKMG-TV 6 Orlando | Submitted by: jonsl
"An elderly man was killed Monday when his pet deer attacked him. The nine point buck gored and mauled 79 year old Donald Sellers while Sellers was working on a fence on his property... it often became aggressive during the rutting and mating season. He believes that might have prompted the attack."

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Let's keep this cure our little secret...
CNN | Submitted by: Kaiser Wilhelm
Team discovers bacteria living in Scottish slime-pools, powerfull enough to cure MRSA (Staph infections), which poses as "the greatest threat to patients who have undergone surgery." Instead of revealing the identity of this potentially life-saving bacteria... "AquaPharm is keeping the identity of its MRSA-killing bacteria a closely guarded secret, and taken out patents on how they can be cultivated and used." You may not be able to patent bacteria (yet), but patenting how that organism is used is apparently acceptable.

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Poor quality rope spoiled Romanian's suicide
XtraMSN | Submitted by: Incite
"A Romanian man plans to complain to consumer authorities about the poor quality of a rope he used in a failed attempt to hang himself, Romanian papers have reported... "You can't even die in this country."

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WI attorney suspended for smuggling... tobacco
Racine Journal Times | Submitted by: palsgraf
"Racine attorney William F. Mross' license to practice law has been suspended for 90 days beginning April 1. The Wisconsin Supreme Court announced his suspension Tuesday... Mross, 52, was accused of smuggling tobacco to Racine County Jail inmates in December 2001. Originally he was charged with two felonies, but the case was settled when he pleaded no contest to violating a county ordinance on obstruction of justice."

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At least they didn't die for nothing
Wire Services | Submitted by: Jarnell
"Four of the addicts who had been taking placebo. 20% of the group, died after leaving the program. Everyone in the buprenorphine group was alive at the end of the year, even the five patients who dropped out."

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Racist bake sale at Berkeley
Fox News | Submitted by: D.Rango
"A conservative group at the University of California-Berkeley held a bake sale with items priced according to the buyer's ethnicity as a protest against affirmative action. For the same chocolate chip cookie, whites were being charged $1.50, Asians $1.25, Latinos (Hispanics not from Mexico) $1.00, Chicanos (Hispanics from Mexico) 75 cents, American Indians 50 cents, and blacks 25 cents."

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God tries to kill Jeb Bush, fails
Miami Herald | Submitted by: Rockpile
"Gov. Jeb Bush's plane was struck by lightning as it traveled from Tallahassee to Orlando on Thursday... The strike put a hole in one of the Beechcraft King Air's wings, but none of the seven people onboard was injured, said Alia Faraj, a spokeswoman for the governor."

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Wedding a smash: dancing grenade accident
Australian Broadcasting | Submitted by: deluded self
"A hand-grenade carried by a teenager at a Cambodian wedding party has accidentally exploded, killing four people and injuring 41... The grenade fell off the young man's belt as he was dancing."

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High School principal is batshit insane
Atlanta Journal-Constitution | Submitted by: Dirty Sammy
Employees say Jester has blared gospel music and sermons from his office and speaks frequently of needing to rid the school of demons. Williams said district officials were concentrating on the alleged physical threats... "Principal: I'm just going to get my gun, shoot the whole staff and shoot myself... Kendrick: Mr. Jester, do you know how much trouble you could be in just for saying that? Principal: Mrs. Kendrick, I'm going to shoot you first."

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The Upskirt Howto
Mainichi Daily News | Submitted by: LucrezaBorgia
"It's common sense for guys into this sort of thing to make sure they get a photo of the face of any woman whose skirt they've just snapped with a concealed camera.... That is, there's no point in simply having a photo of the inside of a woman's skirt unless you can identify with what she looks like. Fans would probably prefer having a shot of her face even if the image of her panties wasn't so good. You often hear of guys who've taken a picture from up a skirt that shows everything, but they'll be disappointed because they didn't get a snap of her face."

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Family wins $24M in cross burning judgement
UPI | Submitted by: Dirty Sammy
"A Texas jury has awarded $24 million to a black family to punish five men who burned a cross in their yard and to send a strong message... Charlie Parker, the attorney for White, Bergeron and Mathews, argued during the trial that the five defendants had already been punished. He said his clients are indigent and cannot afford an appeal." Good luck collecting.

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Elephant clown makeup kit sold seperately
BBC | Submitted by: Matt-n-Leanne
"An animal welfare group is preparing to harness Indian elephants with special reflectors to protect them from traffic accidents... Elephant owners will not be forced to use them - but they will be provided free of charge at first as wildlife experts assess their usefulness."

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Money for blood for oil
Village Voice | Submitted by: Darth W. Vader
"A new Web site aims to let grassroots peaceniks place their bets in the ultimate "dead pool": at Marchtowar they can lay down five dollar wagers on when—to the minute—the new Iraq War will start. The winner walks away with 20 percent of the kitty in the form of prepaid gasoline cards, while the rest will go to humanitarian aid in the war's aftermath."

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Proof that Satan works in telemarketing
Wire Services | Submitted by: Ann Onymous
"A telemarketing tool that penetrates home privacy defenses is upping the ante in a technology battle between sales callers and consumers seeking shelter from unsolicited calls... Castel Inc., a maker of automated dialing technology, boasts that its DirectQuest software is immune to the TeleZapper, a $40 gadget designed to thwart sales calls by faking the tones of a disconnected number." Telemarketers, of course, are quick to claim that they respect the rights of individuals to avoid their pitches, but the existence and use of these machines proves otherwise.

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Crazy killer ants
News Corporation | Submitted by: Dirty Sammy
"Described as one of the world's worst species of ant, the crazy critter does not bite or sting, instead it sprays acid into the eyes of animals, and potentially humans, the CSIRO has warned... "The ant sprays formic acid as a means of subduing its prey, if people get the acid on their hands and then rub their eyes, you are basically putting acid in your eye."

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Deadly smoking mishap leaves an eldery dead
Town Online | Submitted by: O. Bacon
"Manning had burned her whole body, but she was somehow able to get into the shower to put out the flames, change her clothes and then call 911. When firefighters from Engine 1 arrived, she answered the door and told them what happened... Between 75 and 80 percent of her body had third-degree burns, and firefighters could see burnt skin falling off her face when they arrived."

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Multipe baby defenestration mystery
Sacramento Bee | Submitted by: Jim Jones
"The area where the girls were thrown has shrubs and trees on one side. Metal gas and electricity meters are set against the apartment wall, and a strip of ground in the middle was made muddy and softer by morning rain." SOFTER?

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