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February 20, 2003

Operation KFC: The chicken defense
Time | Submitted by: John
"Worried that the pollution from blown oil installations will clog up complicated detection equipment and make it difficult to pick up deadly chemicals and nerve agents, U.S. marines will drive into battle across the dusty plains of Iraq with caged chickens atop their Hum-Vees... Dubbed Operation Kuwaiti Field Chicken (KFC), the use of chickens is sure to enrage animal activists."

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How to break into an ATM. Really.
Cambridge University | Submitted by: Soylent
A student at Cambridge has found terrible flaws in the cryptographic protocols used to protect PIN (personal identification numbers) of ATM cards. It turns out that because these protocols are proprietary, nobody had really looked at them, and they are full of holes. Remembering that a bank's primary job is to protect money, this is astonishing. It should give everyone a warm and fuzzy feeling about the global banking system. Both files here are in Adobe PDF format. The second URL is an interesting gag order.

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Clear Channel giving deregulation a bad name
Salon | Submitted by: Soylent
"Now the heat is coming from other media company executives and Beltway lobbyists. They are dismayed that Clear Channel is doing what many might have thought impossible. In an era when Republicans control the government and big business generally gets what it wants, Clear Channel is making deregulation look bad... The Commerce Committee," says BIA Financial's O'Brien, "was sending a message to the FCC about media consolidation: We don't want this to happen again."

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Albert Speer (Jr.) finding lebensraum in Beijing
The Scotsman | Submitted by: Soylent
"Albert Speer jnr, who was born a year after Hitler came to power, is among three contenders for a multi-billion pound contract hailed as the architectural Holy Grail of the new millennium... More than 60 years ago it was his father who dreamed of such glory. Hitler bestowed upon him the honour of rebuilding the Reich capital to become a metropolis like no other."

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Don't eat the giant shrimp
Honolulu Advertiser | Submitted by: ryan
"State Department of Health signs posted along the canal warn people not to eat fish or shellfish found in the Ala Wai because of possible contamination from urban runoff into the Waikiki waterway. But that didn't stop Keith Harvey, a barge mate working on the Ala Wai dredging project. Harvey cooked one of several Mantis Shrimp (Odontodactylus Scyllarus) pulled from the mud at the bottom of the canal. The largest shrimp weighed in at 1.35 pounds and 15 inches."

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Convicted of 3,066 counts, gets 15 years
Wire Services | Submitted by: Penfold
A Moroccan student convicted Wednesday of 3,066 counts [yes, thats more than three thousand counts] of accessory to murder for helping three suicide pilots in the Sept. 11 attacks on the United States was given a whopping sentence of 15 years in jail. By comparison, if you get caught with marijuana three times in the US, you go to jail for the rest of your non- 3066 people murdering, non- terrorist asshole life. How about some fucking parity here.

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Cops accidentally erase tape of murder confession
Baltimore Sun | Submitted by: Rev. Soror Lucy Cannon
"The accidental erasure of some taped statements a father made to Baltimore homicide detectives concerning his role in the death of his 2-month-old daughter last week has prompted an internal investigation, officials said Wednesday... The disclosure by Clark concerned the arrest and taped admissions of Kenneth L. Jenkins, 20, who was charged with first- degree murder last week in the death of his daughter, A'shia, whose body has not been found."

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eBay to Law Enforcement: We're here to help
Yale | Submitted by: Cyclograph
"We [eBay] try to make rules to make it difficult for people to commit fraud and easy for you [law enforcement agencies] to investigate. One is our Privacy policy. I know from investigating eBay fraud cases that eBay has probably the most generous policy of any internet company when it comes to sharing information... "So, that really opens the door for us. That means that what our policy is that if you are law enforcement agency you can fax us on your letterhead to request information: who is that beyond the seller ID, who is beyond this user ID. We give you their name, their address, their e-mail address and we can give you their sales history without a subpoena." And now they own PayPal, whoom have been touting themselves as a replacement for your normal bank for years (nevermind they aren't FDIC insured) it's not just auction transaction information they can hand out. Now it's all up for grabs for any agency that cares to inquire... no subeona or questions asked!

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Utah may add a tax on sex industries
Deseret News | Submitted by: Porn Lover
"A revised version of legislation that would levy an additional tax on sex related industries, and save the state porn czar's job in the process, has surfaced at the 2003 Legislature... HB300 would impose an additional 10 percent tax on escort services and strip clubs, diverting half of the revenue to adult and youth corrections' sex offender treatment programs." Except the people engaging in those activities aren't exactly dangerous sex offenders.

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Tractor crushes police pursuers
TwinCities.com | Submitted by: Violet
"Baffled by how to stop the mechanical beast, deputies followed it at speeds only up to 30 mph on country roads for 20 miles, watching helplessly as it crushed a Grant County (Minn.) Sheriff's Department squad car with its 6-foot tires. "It was kind of a hopeless feeling," said Grant County Sheriff's Deputy Dale Christopherson, describing the moment when the tractor's front end rode up onto the trunk of his squad, shattering the back windshield."

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Ghana gold workers paid in condoms
BBC | Submitted by: Ann Onymous
"A gold mining company in Ghana says it has managed to reduce Aids and HIV infection rates among its workers by over 75%, by giving staff condoms in their pay packets. Ashanti Goldfields says the number of infections at its Obuasi mine fell from 271 in 1998 to 62 last year. The mine's human resources manager, Elaine Kwame, told the BBC's Network Africa programme that the scheme had been chosen as the most effective way of getting the Aids prevention message across to all staff."

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Drive to the airport, get your car searched
Minneapolis Star Tribune | Submitted by: Squeak, the Human Chew Toy
"Responding to concerns about possible violations of civil liberties, police at Minneapolis-St. Paul International Airport on Tuesday suspended their day-old practice of randomly searching cars and trucks entering the airport... The enhanced security was ordered by the federal Transportation Security Administration (TSA) in response to the elevation of the national terrorist warning system from yellow to orange."

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Starballz: Star Wars parody porn
E! | Submitted by: anonymous
This is an older story, from 2002: "The Jedi mastermind's Lucasfilm empire has struck out in the first round of its legal battle with some upstart pornographers. At issue: the X-rated Starballz cartoon... Last week, a federal judge in San Francisco decided against blocking the sale of the animé saga of "Wank Solo," clearing the way for Starballz creator Media Market Group to resume hawking the $14.95 video online."

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Jesse Jackson's slight conflict of interest
Fox News | Submitted by: Dirty Sammy
"Mosley told Fox News that he wrote the owners two months ago about "over-crowding" at the club, also called E2, and the "catastrophic potential if an emergency occurred... "I was certainly outraged knowing this was something that clearly could have been prevented," Mosley said, adding that when he showed the letter to Jackson's Rainbow-PUSH organization on Monday, officials there were obviously not interested... "It was clearly not on the agenda. As a matter of fact, I was told to put the letter away," Mosley said."

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Teenage lesbian blood lust shocker
ic Berkshire | Submitted by: Dirty Sammy
"A teenage lesbian who went berserk after discovering her partner had been having sex in a churchyard with her best friend was jailed for three years on Friday... Furious Sarah White grabbed a foot-long kitchen knife and slashed her love rival across the face."

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Nine year old beats granny with shopping cart
South Florida Sun-Sentinel | Submitted by: Dirty Sammy
"A 9 year old boy who was home while suspended from school was arrested and charged Tuesday after he allegedly struck his 88-year-old grandmother with a shopping cart, wrapped a blanket over her head to quiet her then pelted her with rocks, police said." The boy's 11 year old brother: "He does that to me all the times. My brother is very bad. He is always getting in trouble at school."

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The Bible As hate literature
World Net Daily | Submitted by: Dirty Sammy
"Certain passages of the Bible can be construed as hate literature if placed in a particular context, according to a Canadian provincial court... Leviticus 20:13, says, according to the New International Version, "If a man lies with a man as one lies with a woman, both of them have done what is detestable. They must be put to death; their blood will be on their own heads."

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Sad but true, beloved Mungo Man not so old
Wire Services | Submitted by: Ryan Duggan
Mungo Man, Australia's oldest dead body has recently been found to only be 40,000 years old. twenty two thousand short of its supposed 62,000 year old status: "The age of the skeleton is important because if the remains are younger than previously expected they fit in better with the "out of Africa" theory, which suggests early humans migrated from Africa to other parts of the globe."

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Heroic individual's third attempt to arrest Mugabe
London Telegraph | Submitted by: f00f
"We summoned the police and handed him over, together with affidavits from Zimbabwe torture victims. But the police let Mugabe go and arrested us instead. The Attorney-General and Metropolitan Police Commissioner have never explained why they freed this torturing tyrant and allowed him to return to Zimbabwe to continue his reign of murder and mayhem."

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Spam killing leaves Nigerian diplomat dead
The Register | Submitted by: anonymous
"Unconfirmed, and thus far sketchy reports, suggest the unnamed suspect was a victim of a 419 (AKA advanced fee) fraud... The scam called 419, after the relevant section of Nigeria's criminal code, begins with offers of sums beyond the dreams of avarice in exchange for use of a Western bank account."

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