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January 17, 2003

Man fed dead neighbor to father
Independent Online | Submitted by: Milk Bone
"Indonesian police have arrested a man who allegedly dug up the corpse of his 80 year old female neighbour before eating parts of the body and feeding some of the flesh to his unwitting father, a police official said on Thursday... Officers also found two sets of dried male genitals in the house of the suspect."

Read article... and This article...

Second hand flatulence knows no borders
Fox News | Submitted by: Nic
"Second-hand flatulence knows no borders," he said... The Huzas, a husband-and-wife team, say the cushion uses charcoal liner technology to filter out both malodorous smells and head-turning noises. The fabric is washable, and a removable foam filter muffles sounds while the activated carbon absorbs odors."

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Allegations of Satanistic cannibalism in Germany
Times | Submitted by: Mike in NY
This is the second hand "report": "Babies have been killed, sliced up and eaten by a German Satanist group, according to media reports yesterday, stirring fears that last month’s arrest of a self-confessed cannibal was not an isolated incident." Actually, we suspect this is disinformation likely leaked by a London institute we are familiar with. The story is just too sketchy, details not forthcoming, and there is a past history of fabricating and planting such stories in the area of child abuse and satanism.

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Man poses as dying boy to get kiddie porn
MSNBC | Submitted by: leviathanx13x
Huffman is alleged to have posed as a 17 year old boy dying of brain cancer in Internet chat rooms to persuade juveniles in Kentucky, West Virginia, Massachusetts and California to send him nude photos of themselves. The victims range from age 13-17."

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Discarded hard drives a snooper's paradise
San Francisco Chronicle | Submitted by: Any Mouse
"Over two years, Simson Garfinkel and Abhi Shelat bought 158 used hard drives at secondhand computer stores and on eBay. Of the 129 drives that functioned, 69 still had recoverable files on them and 49 contained "significant personal information"; medical correspondence, love letters, pornography and 5,000 credit card numbers. One even had a year's worth of transactions with account numbers from a cash machine in Illinois."

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Superintendent kept student as "boy"
Times Herald-Record | Submitted by: Sukebe Panda!
"The Middletown school board knew of a relationship between suspended Superintendent Robert Sigler and the 15 year old male high school student he's accused of molesting before Sigler's arrest last week, a source close to the board said yesterday... "Something was brought up in executive session that he [Sigler] may have pulled the kid out of class a lot," the source said. "But there was nothing that would raise a question of impropriety of a sexual relationship." Right.

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Stealing the family jewels
Straits Times | Submitted by: Chris Hansen
"It is fairly warm in Singapore, so one often sees people on the street in shorts and t-shirts. But normally burglars choose to be more fully clad and disguised when going about their business. Burglars in underwear are relatively rare."

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Anti-war activists go nude
San Francisco Chronicle | Submitted by: Any Mouse
Follow-up on previous story, with new pictures! "Lying naked on a Marin hillside, a group called Unreasonable Women Baring Witness hopes to bring attention to those against going to war with Iraq. None of the Unreasonable Women Baring Witness members describes herself as a nudist, but they include two Republicans, two '60s radicals, three singers, two teachers and two masseuses, among others."

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Darts player blames air conditioning for defeat
BBC | Submitted by: Harry Dahl
"Mervyn King launched a scathing attack on organisers of the Embassy World Darts after his 5-2 semi-final defeat at the hands of Raymond Barneveld. The Englishman said a failure to turn off the air conditioning during his match meant his darts failed to travel in their usual trajectory. "I asked for the air conditioning to be turned off, because it was blowing my darts all over the shop... I throw a light dart and I pitch my darts: I don't throw them."

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Someone explain Fair Use to Ginsburg
Minneapolis Star Tribune | Submitted by: Crazy Quagga
"Justices said the copyright extension, named for the late Rep. Sonny Bono, R-Calif., was neither unconstitutional overreaching by Congress, nor a violation of constitutional free-speech rights." Yes it was, and yes it was. By this logic, free libraries should have to pay royalties on the books they have. Also very cheap to ride the legislation on the back of a bad skier's corpse.

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Fox renews Simpsons through 2005
CNN | Submitted by: uucp
Best Greenlight Ever: The Simpsons has been renewed through 2005. All this and the show will go down in history as the longest-running sitcom ever. From the Fox website: "The Simpsons has to beat Gunsmoke, on CBS from 1955 to 1975, to become the longest-running scripted show ever in prime time."

Read article... and This article...

Plague, Plague, who's got the Plague?
Lubbock Avalanche-Journal | Submitted by: David 'Inky' Scott
"Dr. Thomas C. Butler of the Texas Tech University Health Sciences Center, internationally recognized scientist in the field of plague research, has been arrested after making a false statement to the Feds that samples of the plague he'd been studying had gone missing. A report that 30 vials of plague were missing from a TTUHSC lab set off an intensive FBI investigation Tuesday. The question remains: who the hell would even claim to having samples of the plague, let alone lie about losing them?

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Pack pistols, Pack fudge, it's all good
MSNBC | Submitted by: Gary MiddleMan
"My gun rights are more important than my gay rights," said Miner. "They’re both important, but people shouldn’t assume that just because I'm gay, I should buy into a certain political party, like the Democrats."

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Bananas could split for good
BBC | Submitted by: Monkeynavigated
The problem is that the banana we eat is a seedless, sterile article which could slip the way of its predecessor which was wiped out by blight half a century ago... New Scientist compared the current threat to bananas to the potato blight which caused the devastating Irish famine of the 1840s."

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Stay at home Dad needs a new hobby
Wire Services | Submitted by: HawaiianAtheist
Stay-at home dad sees coupon for $200 off a new car. Proceeds to buy 200 copies of said paper for coupons to get a new car. When presented, he's rebuffed, and he claims coupons didn't have Limit one per customer. "Hmmmm... if the papers were 50 cents apiece (Barring the (possible) fact he "stole" them from Newspaper Vending Machines), he spent about $103.50 for 200+ papers. Of course, if it was the Sunday Edition, that's around $310.50. The Wife must be so proud of her husband... or getting a divorce right now."

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Lamborghini wrecked by joy-riding jackass
Richmond Times-Dispatch | Submitted by: Drillcop
What do you do if you have no license, four DWI's, and zero coordination? You test drive a $300,000 Lamborghini belonging to a hip-hop star that is being stored at your towing company, then wreck it, abandon it, and deny everything. Oh, and then you go to jail for three years.

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Suicide bombing masters: Sri Lankan Rebels
New York Times | Submitted by: LucrezaBorgia
"The Tigers did not invent the suicide attack, but they proved the tactic to be so unnerving and effective for a vastly outmanned fighting force that their methods were studied and copied, notably in the Middle East... Suicide bombers killed one Sri Lankan president, wounded another and killed a former Indian prime minister. They took out government ministers, mayors and moderate Tamil leaders, decimating the country's political and intellectual leadership.They attacked naval ships — destroying a third of the Sri Lankan Navy — and oil tankers; the airport in Colombo, the capital; the Temple of the Tooth, home to Sri Lanka's most sacred Buddhist relic; and Colombo's own World Trade Center. They killed certainly hundreds, and possibly thousands, of civilians, although civilians were never their explicit target."

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Fat-ass fuck frenzy in the can
ncbuy | Submitted by: Milk Bone
"A Los Angeles pornographer has just finished filming a gang bang featuring 50 fat slobs weighing more than 300 pounds apiece and a normal-sized gal... Ron Spallone admits the seven-hour shoot for his upcoming film, The World's First 300-Pound Gang Bang, was "disgusting" and the catering bill for the cost more than the actual production."

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Don't fuck with Granny
Los Angeles Daily News | Submitted by: Helmut
"An 84 year old woman fatally shot her son-in-law with a rifle from more than 200 yards away in an apparent family feud over rural land, prosecutors said." And she did it WITHOUT a scope.

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Shit explosion at Boston sewage plant
Boston Globe | Submitted by: Rev. Soror Lucy Cannon
"The methane explosion that injured two workers at the Deer Island waste water treatment plant Tuesday was touched off when one of the workers tried to light a cigarette, a Boston Fire Department spokesman said yesterday, despite a no-smoking policy inside the huge facility."

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Condoms in Sizzler clam chowder
Fresno Bee | Submitted by: anonymous
Lawsuit over condoms found in clam chowder at Sizzler in Tulare, California. A new take on the old expression, Hudson River Whitefish: "Cruz told The Bee that employees soon after told her they had found another condom in the chowder at the salad bar and had removed a pair of condoms from the main pot in the kitchen... She said the manager apologized and took the cup, but Cruz demanded to keep the condoms. She said she had the server place them in a napkin, wrapped with tinfoil inside a Sizzler bag; almost two years later, the condoms sit in her freezer awaiting their debut in court."

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First person accounts of N. Korean prison work camps
MSNBC | Submitted by: Rufferto
A collection of three articles detailing deaths and tortures both felt and witnessed. Read lines like "They put salty water into the pregnant women’s womb with a large syringe, in order to kill the baby, even when the woman was eight months or nine months pregnant" and "Once they picked out 50 persons from our group, and they put them in the auditorium and gave them a piece of boiled Korean cabbage, and then as soon as they ate it, blood came out from their mouth and anus" plus lots and lots more.

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