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November 20, 2002

Home found covered in feces
WKMG-TV 6 Orlando | Submitted by: Rio
"A couple in Ormond Beach, Fla., was arrested after animal control officers discovered 9 dead cats decomposing in boxes, and the couple's home completely covered in feces, according to Local 6 News. "The fluids were running down the side of the chairs," Animal control officer Dee Ferguson said. "The sides of the chairs were actually stuck to the floor because of the feces on the floor. There was not an area in the house that was not covered in cat feces." Officers had to wear respirators to enter the home to shoot the video and remove the live animals."

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Fox news biased? Who thought
FAIR | Submitted by: Turkey Killer
When it comes to Fox News Channel, conservatives don't feel the need to "work the ref." The ref is already on their side. Since its 1996 launch, Fox has become a central hub of the conservative movement's well oiled media machine. Together with the GOP organization and its satellite think tanks and advocacy groups, this network of fiercely partisan outlets, such as the Washington Times, the Wall Street Journal editorial page and conservative talk radio shows like Rush Limbaugh's, forms a highly effective right wing echo chamber where GOP-friendly news stories can be promoted, repeated and amplified. Fox knows how to play this game better than anyone."

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Goths, Nazis and Wicca
Guardian | Submitted by: heptapod
"Daniel, 26, broke contact with Lewa after a row at a party. Lewa told the court that he had received a letter from his erstwhile friend in July, a few days before the Rudas killed Hackert. In it, Daniel called Lewa a Judas and enclosed a photograph of himself, covered in blood and apparently hanging from hooks in the ceiling. He was pointing two gas pistols at the camera."

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Nebraska keepin' it electric
Newsday | Submitted by: Dirty Sammy
"The [Nebraska] Legislature's Judiciary Committee rejected a bill Tuesday that would have changed the state's method of execution from the electric chair to death by injection... Nebraska is the only state with the chair as its sole means of execution."

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Cheers: Buggery finally legal in UK
ic Wales | Submitted by: Honkey Kong
"Offences like buggery, gross indecency and soliciting by men will be binned while protections against rapists, paedophiles and other perverts will be tightened. Defendants accused of rape will have to be able to show they took "reasonable action" to ensure the other person consented to sex."

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Jeers: Average soldier can't locate Iraq
CNN | Submitted by: Jack Cox
America is poised to invade Iraq. But this may not be as troubling to the Iraqis because: "The society survey found that only about one in seven, 13 percent, of Americans between the age of 18 and 24, the prime age for military warriors, could find Iraq. The score was the same for Iran, an Iraqi neighbor."

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Sex trade infiltrates chiropracty
USA Today | Submitted by: Drexl Spivey
"HMO payments for chiropractors' spinal adjustments are declining. McAndrews blames reduced incomes for subjecting desperate chiropractors who are "very weak in the ethical area" to temptation... California has 15,000 chiropractors, far more than the market can support, Hayes says. Squeezed by competition, some turn to crime or are duped by spurious employment interviewers who photocopy and misuse their licenses and diplomas, she says."

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Media continues to ignore Bush's military record
Straight Goods | Submitted by: Ann Onymous
Once again, Veterans Day went by without anybody in the mainstream media pointing out that our Commander in Chief is a draft dodger. It is well documented that George W. Bush's daddy pulled some strings and got him into the Texas Air National Guard. Then he got himself transferred to Alabama, where he was destined to serve with distinction... except, he never showed up. Basically, Bush decided to ditch his military duties for about a year. And yet, for some reason, he was never charged with desertion. Not to mention the fact that Bush was grounded for several months after refusing to submit to a routine physical exam in 1972. [One possible motive: the exam would have included a compulsory drug test.]

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Louisiana puts bounty on Nutria
Wire Services | Submitted by: Jennipher
"Nutria: furry, swamp dwelling rodents that look like 10 pound rats with webbed feet are now worth money. Starting Wednesday, the state of Louisiana will pay a $4 a tail bounty; officials prefer the term "incentive", in hopes of wiping out 400,000 nutria this winter."

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Gorilla Boogers latest Japanese snack craze
Mainichi Daily News | Submitted by: LucrezaBorgia
"A friend of mine saw this product my missus' family was making and said, 'Gee, that looks like gorilla snot!' As soon as I heard that, I knew I had a hit product on my hands... The missus and her family were dead against the idea, but I managed to overcome their opposition and create the gorilla booger candies under their current product name in April last year."

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Feast at the zoo goes horribly wrong
Las Vegas Sun | Submitted by: Mirai
"Intruders freed a leopard from her cage at a zoo in western Germany and the cat entered a nearby pen and killed 10 kangaroos. Only three were spared, including a baby found in the pouch of its dead mother.. The leopard, 3 year old Katrin, was found lying among the dead gray kangaroos at the Krefeld Zoo on Sunday morning."

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Woman's diet causes friction with local men
NC Buy | Submitted by: Juggernaut
This story smells like a plant: "Starting December 1, a plump porn star named Kim Kelly hopes to lose between 10 and 20 pounds by spending 30 days on a diet consisting largely of semen, or as she prefers, man juice."

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Jackasses end up in jail
WKMG-TV 6 Orlando | Submitted by: Rio
"Two Kentucky men are in jail after allegedly pulling a stunt Saturday night inspired by the movie "Jackass." According to investigators, one of the men ran at a car that was driving on Bardstown Road and jumped back-first into the windshield. The impact shattered the windshield of the car, but Whalen, 23, was not seriously hurt, WLKY reported. The impact shattered the windshield of the car, but Whalen, 23, was not seriously hurt." They had just watched the MTV movie.

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Victoria's Secret upsets busybody CWFA
Minneapolis Star Tribune | Submitted by: Bammer
"'Despite what the PTC says, this is not pornography,' CBS spokesman Chris Ender said. 'It's a one-hour fashion show mixed with musical performances and comedy segments.' [And boobies.] Concerned Women for America, the National Organization for Women and the Parents Television Council were among several groups protesting the televised fashion show, which was taped in New York City last week."

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Junk food great for education
Science Daily | Submitted by: Humphrey T.
"Faced with ever-increasing pressure to boost state mandated test scores, some school districts have sought an advantage by pumping up their pupils with extra calories from junk food, a study conducted at the University of Florida suggests... on test days many districts fed students high energy foods with low nutritional value because the empty calories gives students a short term mental lift much like carbohydrate loading energizes athletes."

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Baby fetishists in photo exhibit
The Age | Submitted by: meatload
"Beginning with a contact number for a house catering to them in England, where she lives, Borland gradually unearthed baby fetish groups in Australia, France and the United States. The babies' lack of self-consciousness, whether dancing ring-a-rosey or masturbating, is almost as surprising as the first shock of seeing a hairy middle-aged man in a bonnet. Most of the babies are men, usually pretending to be little girls."

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Male birth-control pill studied
Seattle Post-Intelligencer | Submitted by: mokesmay
"Instead of suppressing a woman's egg once a month, this new pill would block millions of sperm produced by a man each day. "It actually is somewhat harder, biologically, to turn off the production of all sperm," said Dr. William Bremner, director of the UW's Male Contraception Research Center, just created with a $9.5 million, five-year federal grant." Like we would remember to take a damn pill every day.

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The Vacci-Nation
Guerrilla News Network | Submitted by: anonymous
"As it stands, the American public will now be subject to forced immunization, under the penalty of fine and imprisonment, without the potential of legal recourse against the companies that manufacture them. And, while Republicans were quick to spin the liability protection as necessary for the bolstering of unfettered bio-technological research (in an era of potentially nation—crippling bio-terrorism), one need only read the fine print that retroactively limits the liability of corporations in major class action suits to see that this is one of the most overtly cynical cases of the government’s exploitation of the public panic over terrorism to further its political goals and pay back blue chip corporate donors."

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Have it your way, even after you die!
Seattle Post-Intelligencer | Submitted by: mokesmay
Americans are choosing cremation now more than ever, with 26% opting for flame broil. Some even ask for extras: "When I die, my wife's going to put me in the suitcase and she's going to scatter me in the Bay of Mazatlan," he said, with a hearty laugh. "So I know I always have one more vacation coming."

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Four new charges against Bumfights
WKMG-TV 6 Orlando | Submitted by: anonymous
"The new charges involve illegal fight promotion and battery. The four defendants pleaded not guilty to the charges Tuesday in San Diego Superior Court in El Cajon. But lawyers for the men plan said they plan to challenge to the charges as too vague."

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A workers paradise for the Castros
Washington Times | Submitted by: Son of Benway
"Fidel Castro's luxurious lifestyle has been revealed in home videotapes smuggled out of Cuba by a former girlfriend of one of his sons. The videos, which show the communist leader preparing for a sumptuous banquet and lounging on leather sofas in his villa in Havana, give the first peek into the residence that most Cubans have never seen... It pictures the spacious compound and carefully landscaped garden and reveals that many of the family are wearing designer clothes."

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Ted Koppel endorses media censorship
Village Voice | Submitted by: Son of Benway
"What I'm saying," Koppel announced in a Patton-esque baritone, "is if I'm running a war and I've got representatives of ABC, NBC, CBS, CNN, MSNBC, Al Jazeera, and the BBC, and they're out there with my troops and they've got the technical capacity to feed back what is happening live, so that the folks who are sitting in Baghdad have only to turn on their set to CNN and they can see what's happening on the front lines from the American vantage point, I'm saying it would be criminal to permit that."

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Cop tries to rape man at gunpoint
Kansas City Star | Submitted by: biglamprey
"Tomasic said that [Officer] Dupree allegedly displayed his handgun and demanded that the victim perform oral sex, but the victim refused. Dupree allegedly drove the victim around for a while and then took him back to the parole office, where they went inside. Dupree then demanded that the victim submit to anal sex, Tomasic said, and the victim again refused. The charges allege that Dupree touched the victim in the car and again in the building with the intent to "arouse or satisfy" Dupree's sexual desires."

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Death by Slow Puncture
Independent Online | Submitted by: rontrini
"The director of the office of the judicial inspectorate of prisons, Gideon Morris, said gang tribunals would sentence errant gang members, or prisoners who refused to join them, to be raped by HIV-positive inmates. Sometimes the rape would be carried out by one person, sometimes by several."

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Ho's workin' it in S. Central high school
KNBC-TV 4 Los Angeles | Submitted by: Milk Bone
"Teachers wrote a letter claiming major problems are plaguing the South Central Los Angeles campus including students who are gambling, drinking, cutting classes, using profanity, smoking marijuana, threatening teachers and committing sexual acts... [Principal] Noble said the problems are typical of large urban schools. Parents say that's no excuse. Noble held meetings with parents Tuesday night to address the concerns. He denied the charge that prostitutes operate out of the boys' restrooms."

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Saddam at face value
New York Times | Submitted by: LucrezaBorgia
"After more than 25 years, and several thousand portraits of the man whom Mr. Abid always calls "His Excellency," things have taken a forlorn turn for the man known among Iraqis as Mr. Hussein's favorite artist. Commissions have been so sparse that the government "minders" who have taken a generation of reporters to interview him have taken to whispering that a financial "gift" for the dispirited painter might not be amiss."

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Springtime for Goebbels
BBC | Submitted by: Rev. Soror Lucy Cannon
Is German TV ready for a comedy about Goebbels switching places with a Jewish prisoner? Americans already broke the barrier with TV series "Hogan's Heroes," back in the 1960's, the movie "The Producers," and comic book "The Desert Peach," but Nazis as comic fodder remain taboo in Germany.

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