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October 09, 2002

The greatest journalistic correction... EVER!
Daily Evergreen | Submitted by: Scooter The Wonderduck
Remember, folks, these are... The Journalists Of Tomorrow! "The story 'Filipino-American history recognized' stated that the 'Nuestra Senora de Buena Esperanza', the galleon on which the first Filipinos landed at Morro, Bay, Calif., loosely translates to 'The Big Ass Spanish Boat'. It actually translates to 'Our Lady of Good Peace'... We hope these groups accept our deep regret."

Read article... and This article...

Bertelsmann : Tainted by Nazis
Independent | Submitted by: Soylent
The world's largest publishing firm is Bertelsmann, owner of Random House and numerous other ventures. What nobody realized was a history that was kept hidden, that they were the Nazi's primary publisher: "The researchers were stunned to discover that Bertelsmann was the biggest publisher of Nazi texts, bigger even than the National Socialist Party's own printing business. It pumped out 20 million books to spread the word. Its support was evident long before the war. In the early 1930s, the firm published, for instance, The Christmas Book for Hitler Youth, which tried to blend Christianity with Nazi ideology."

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Bovine boob jobs
Milwaukee Journal Sentinel | Submitted by: Ike the Llama
Those well endowed heifers you see at the state fairs may have gotten a little modern assistance in an attempt to score higher points at dairy cow shows. As in wet T-shirt contests, size, shape and texture appears to matter most to the judges, and some less than scrupulous owners have been rigging the contests by using injections of saline or glucose to draw water into the udder, causing it to swell. Other methods include injecting isobutane gas 'foamies' or a 'liquid silver protein" in areas that are wrinkled to smooth them out and make them appear more youthful. "The udder is 40 percent of 100 points because that's where your livelihood comes from" says Elmo Wendorf, dairy farmer. No mention of whether silicone implants are also a preferred cheat. Wet T-shirt contestants, take heed!

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I-Pass users open themselves to data sharing
NBC 5 | Submitted by: Voytek
"The I-Pass was initially created to combat traffic congestion. But, in the past three years, the Illinois Tollway Authority has received eleven subpoenas in cases that range from FBI investigations to civil matters. A Joliet man who was fighting for custody of his son and keeping tabs on his ex-wife in an effort to prove she was never home used I-Pass records to show the frequency of his ex-wife's travels on the roads."

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Prediction: Jenny Craig stocks to triple
Globe and Mail | Submitted by: Koz for Concern
"Americans are even fatter than they think they are, with nearly one third of all adults, almost 59 million people, rated obese in a disturbing new government survey based on actual body measurements. One in five Americans, 19.8 per cent, had considered themselves obese in a 2000 survey based on people's own assessments of their girth."

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Tten Afghan war blunders
Spiked | Submitted by: Dead Dude Afghan
Bottom ten of U.S. military and intelligence blunders in Afghanistan: "Three days later, it was revealed that the arms didn't belong to al-Qaeda at all, but to a 'friendly Afghan warlord'. 'Arms blown up by marines were mine', said a headline in the Daily Telegraph, reporting that 'thirty lorry loads of supposed terrorist arms destroyed by the Royal Marines in Afghanistan probably belonged to a coalition ally'. 'Effectively', said one report, 'the Royal Marines are blowing up their own guns'."

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Ex-Survivor survives Toronto bar attack
Ottawa Citizen | Submitted by: Gorg
"Former Survivor contestant Kel Gleason is a real life survivor after he was viciously beaten by four men at a Toronto bar and sent to hospital with cuts to his head. The 33-year-old former U.S. intelligence army officer who spent his childhood and first year of university in Fredericton, N.B., and now lives in Toronto, said he was having a drink last month with two female friends at an nightclub in Toronto to celebrate Asian Focus Night when he was approached by a stranger. The man asked him if he was "that Indian from the Survivor show" and when he replied yes, the man walked away."

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Man's best meal
News Corporation | Submitted by: clove
"A suburban newspaper has reported a dog was rescued from being killed and eaten in Niddrie, when passers-by stopped a man carrying a puppy in a plastic bag. When asked what he was doing, he gestured that he intended to eat the animal." Unfortunately, no law against that.

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Fetus haunts woman after abortion
Daily Record | Submitted by: Spookbabe
"A woman who had an abortion was stunned to find the foetus left in a jar after a hospital blunder. Nicola McManus made the horrific discovery when she was left in a room to answer a phone call from her husband. The jar was labelled with her name."

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Nigerians unaware they will be stoned to death
online.ie | Submitted by: optional
"A Nigerian couple, who were sentenced to death by stoning in August for committing adultery, have not been told of their sentences, their lawyer said today... Prison officials will only allow family and lawyers to see the couple on the condition that they do not tell them they face the death sentence, Ibrahim said. Officials did not explain why the couple could not be told, she added."

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Florida executes female serial killer
WKMG-TV 6 Orlando | Submitted by: Rio
"The state of Florida executed serial killer Aileen Wuornos this morning at 9:47 a.m. EDT. Two efforts to stop the execution with claims that she's not mentally competent were rejected by the Florida Supreme Court on Tuesday. The execution is for one of the six men Wuornos killed along Central Florida roadways in 1989 and 1990."

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Invasion of the Body Snatchers
New York Times | Submitted by: Fecal Mayhem
"A Newark man and his son were charged with desecration of graves and possession of stolen property today after a police search of their home turned up a cauldron holding human skulls and other bones that investigators suspect came from a spate of recent grave and mausoleum robberies here."

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On the Scam Front
Houston Chronicle | Submitted by: Son of Benway
"While President Bush marshals congressional and international support for invading Iraq, a growing number of military officers, intelligence professionals and diplomats in his own government privately have deep misgivings about the administration's double-time march toward war... "Analysts at the working level in the intelligence community are feeling very strong pressure from the Pentagon to cook the intelligence books," said one official, speaking on condition of anonymity."

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Man burnt inside of woman's vagina
Detroit News | Submitted by: tiger
Men might have seen her in a bathing suit, so: "Oakland County Sheriff Michael Bouchard said the two met over the Internet. Zafar used a lit cigarette to repeatedly burn his wife's thighs and inside her vagina over several days, police said. He also poured hot wax on her and cut her with a knife, they said. The woman had at least 20 visible burns on her body, police said."

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Must Puke TV
Miami Herald | Submitted by: Son of Benway
"But don't think for one moment that superheroines don't have issues. They bicker about everything from the contents of the fridge to their costumes. ('Being a crimefighter doesn't mean I have to be a fashion casualty.') And despite all the lycra and cleavage, they have less sex than the average supermarket checkout girl. (Because of all those 'bruises in really embarrassing places.')"

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Random drug searches in hotels
Wire Services | Submitted by: f00f
"Boyd-Young, who is staying in an Elk Grove Village hotel with some 60 of her colleagues for a drug treatment training convention, found herself on the wrong end of an increasingly common practice in suburban hotels: unannounced police drug sweeps... "Then I thought, 'What if people who had stayed there before had left something in the room?'" Hotel manager Javed Akram acknowledged that such a scenario could happen, since hotel staff don't sweep a room for drugs between guests. "It's possible. The best thing to do in a situation like that is to let the police figure out if the person is guilty."

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Homeless crowd witnesses murder-suicide
Santa Monica Mirror | Submitted by: Cr0w
"In what was described by one officer on the scene as a "hideously bloody" act of violence, a man stabbed and killed his estranged wife, on Saturday morning, September 28, then stabbed himself in the chest several times, committing suicide. The couple's six year old son witnessed the attack along with close to 100 homeless people sitting on the lawn."

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Arafat's attempt to assasinate Powell
NewsMax | Submitted by: anonymous
More on the booby-trapped Palestinian Red Crescent ambulance that was disarmed during Colin Powell's visit to Israel in April. Turns out Arafat PERSONALLY lobbied with Zinni to gain clearance for the ambulance to be on that road, under the guise of transporting a "very important" body (placed on top of some very important explosives) to Gaza. Recall he won the Nobel Peace Prize some time ago.

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Bomb was an alarm clock
Lafayette Journal and Courier | Submitted by: The Sweetness
"The West Lafayette Police Department evacuated several apartments near Purdue University on Monday after a maintenance worker found what appeared to be a bomb in an apartment. The "bomb" turned out to be a homemade alarm clock." Police confiscated it. Great picture.

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