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September 15, 2002

I'm too sexy for this executioner's hood
CNN Europe | Submitted by: Meerkat
"Models sporting nooses, execution-style hoods and body-covering bandages brought howls of protest and walkouts at Madrid's most prestigious fashion show... Spectators at the finale of the Pasarela Cibeles fashion show on Friday night booed, whistled and called out to the hooded models to guide them after some tripped."

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Free money in mail a mystery
Topeka Capital-Journal | Submitted by: trickycoyote
"White envelopes containing $10 bills have been arriving mysteriously in the mailboxes of residents of this small, south-central Kansas town... [Postmaster] Risley said the envelopes contain no suspicious substances, and she hasn't contacted authorities. "Tere's no crime being committed."

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Man's legs amputated while he sleeps
This Is Somerset | Submitted by: Stamford
"Glynn Shaw went to bed because his feet were hurting, and woke in hospital a week later to find his legs had been amputated. The next morning his fiancee Debra Cole found him with blood running from his mouth and unable to move his legs. "His legs just looked dead," she said. "They were ice cold and grey. I just panicked and didn't know what was wrong."

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Turban Legend
New York Post | Submitted by: wingnut
"A turbaned man spotted climbing out of a subway maintenance hatch yesterday caused a terror scare after witnesses assumed he was up to no good... cops determined he was just a legitimate Transit Authority worker who happens to be a Sikh. A few hours after the cops let people use the park again, another MTA worker, without a turban, who was unaware of the terror scare climbed down into the same hatch. Nobody looked twice."

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So $50,000 will buy you a Bush
Washington Post | Submitted by: Son of Benway
"Two weeks after a Miami-based liquor manufacturer gave the Florida Republican Party $50,000, Florida Gov. Jeb Bush wrote a letter to a political appointee of his brother, President Bush, asking the U.S. Patent and Trademark Office to "take quick, decisive action" favoring the company in a trademark dispute... Elizabeth Hirst, Jeb Bush's spokeswoman, disputed the allegations. "There was no quid pro quo. The governor and his staff have no knowledge of the timing of contributions."

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Titties and pubes for sale
Independent Online | Submitted by: Son of Benway
"A mortuary attendant in Nigeria has been arrested for trying to sell parts hacked from the corpses of road accident victims, specifically a woman's breasts, to undercover police officers, local newspapers said on Saturday. He was also trying to sell bottles of blood and pubic hair."

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Coffee table book pisses off the peasants
Observer | Submitted by: Son of Benway
"Ricas y Famosas (Rich and Famous) shows the wives, the daughters and the lovers of the country's mega-wealthy striking provocative, defiant, sometimes kittenish and always unabashed poses in extraordinarily opulent surroundings... "The lives of these rich women," said political analyst Lorenzo Meyer, "take place in a morally unacceptable island... surrounded and nourished by historical Mexican poverty."

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Failed mayor demands bribe money back
CNN | Submitted by: jepler
"A disgruntled candidate who lost a race for the post of governor in the Indonesian capital has demanded that members of the city council return bribes he paid them, media reports said Saturday... 40 councilors in the 84-seat body had received a total of $20,000 as a first installment for their [apparently not forthcoming] votes."

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Bush administration loses war with squirrels
Philadelphia Inquirer | Submitted by: Reid Fleming
On Thursday, the White House was forced to admit defeat and uproot a century-old tree from the North Lawn. Beginning with the Bush Administration, squirrels covertly attacked the tree's root system, effectively depriving it of water. No mention on the present location of those squirrels, how they gained physical access to the White House grounds, or who might have trained them. One can only assume that the squirrels have moved on to more vital elements of our nation's arboreal infrastructure.

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Bush planned Iraq regime change before his term
Sunday Herald | Submitted by: NeuroManson
"The blueprint, uncovered by the Sunday Herald, for the creation of a 'global Pax Americana' was drawn up for Dick Cheney (now vice president), Donald Rumsfeld (defence secretary), Paul Wolfowitz (Rumsfeld's deputy), George W Bush's younger brother Jeb and Lewis Libby (Cheney's chief of staff). The document, entitled Rebuilding America's Defences: Strategies, Forces And Resources For A New Century, was written in September 2000 by the neo-conservative think-tank Project for the New American Century."

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